I'll buy a cat and turn it into a welcome mat(perhaps a hat)
And I'll eat prunes so I can take a dump on my shitty lawn.
Or other laxatives and then I'll howl at the moon at dawn.
And I'll keep all my junk in the trunk of my car
that's been broken down since 2024.
Then I'll die because no one thought to keep me dry
After I fall into my own moat wearing only a trenchcoat.
So I'll grin as I flip off children and curse,
because people will think, 'He's just senile.'
Otherwise I'd start right now!
James Jason Dye is a college student from Dubuque, IA. You can find him online at his blog, and his poems at PoemHunter.com.
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