Pelicans wearing pink sunglasses jumped out from behind the van. They were out to get him. The van owner ate their lunch, and it was lemon tart — their favorite! They'd developed a taste for it while sneaking in the back of the corner bakery. Now, their desperation rivaled the one of a heroine addict. Morning, noon and night they needed their lemon tart. But this fucker hadn't left one piece. So they slashed his tires and pooped on his front window. One pelican cracked the windshield glass and saw the Hershey bar. All dove in for it with feathers flying everywhere.
Somebody took a wrong step and released the parking break, sending the van careening onto the train tracks. The man, who owned the van, ran after them, screaming at the top of his lungs, "Stop". They collided with the train in a mass of feathers, blood and chocolate. In heaven the pelicans discovered tiramisu, so much better than lemon tart.