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February 15, 2012

Mormons apologise for baptising Simon Wiesenthal's Jewish parents, continue to "proxy baptize" all the people killed in the Holocaust

One of my hopes that is sure to not come true is that if Romney gets the nod for the GOP nomination I hope we can have an examining of Mormonism and how BALLS CRAZY it is. And rude. So, so rude. A friend of mine, her granddad is a Mormon and has a job being a proxy stand in for other people getting baptized. That is they tell him he is a person, say Malcolm X, and then baptize him into the Mormon religion. And BOOM, by Mormon magic and the distributive property of hoo-hah Malcolm X is now officially a Mormon. Seriously. This is a job. But he isn't paid, because the Mormon church likes to have serfs. On one level I don't care. It's basically a bunch of religious nutters playing their own special form of Dungeons and Dragons but without Mind Flayers and with proxy baptism. On another level it strikes me as absolutely psychotic that people think it's okay to do this. That somehow this gives power or prestige to their church. So here's what I'm doing: every day at 9:45am I am proxy baptizing everyone who ever lived and who ever will live into Atheism. I have a special prayer. I have magic underpants. It's totally legit. So they can keep baptizing all the dead people and all the poor people and all the suckers into their church but it won't matter. Because I just unbaptized them. And it's just as legitimate as their proxy voodoo double reverse spiritual warfare. Game on. Mormons apologise for baptising Simon Wiesenthal's Jewish parents | World news | guardian.co.uk
The Mormon Church has apologised after its members performed posthumous baptisms into Mormonism of the long-dead Jewish parents of famed Nazi hunter and Holocaust survivor Simon Wiesenthal. The baptisms "by proxy" were performed last month in Mormon temples in Utah, Arizona and Idaho, according to the Los Angeles-based Simon Wiesenthal Centre, a Jewish human rights organisation named after the man who hunted down more than 1,000 Nazi war criminals in the years following the second world war. Rabbi Abraham Cooper of the Simon Wiesenthal Centre told Reuters the baptisms were "unacceptable", adding that people who lost everyone and everything and were murdered for being Jewish during the Holocaust should not have their souls hijacked by another religion. The apology came on the same day that Holocaust survivor and Nobel laureate Elie Wiesel called on the Republican US presidential candidate Mitt Romney, a Mormon, to address the issue after Wiesel's own Holocaust victim parents were similarly baptised.

February 14, 2012

Before Valentine's Day, there was Lupercalia

With a bonus discussion of how no one really knows who St. Valentine is (there are multiple contenders) and because of the confusion the Catholic Church officially removed Valentine from their saint calendar. The Seedy, Scandalous History of Valentine's Day : Discovery News
Imagine half-naked men running through the streets, whipping young women with bloodied thongs made from freshly cut goat skins. Although it might sound like some sort of perverted sado-masochistic ritual, this is what the Romans did until 496 A.D. Indeed, mid-February was Lupercalia (Wolf Festival) time. Celebrated on Feb. 15 at the foot of the Palatine Hill beside the cave where, according to tradition, the she-wolf had suckled Romulus and Remus, the festival was essentially a purification and fertility rite. Directed by the Luperci, or "brothers of the wolf," the festival began with the sacrifice of two male goats and a dog, their blood smeared on the faces of Luperci initiates and then wiped off with wool dipped in milk. As thongs were cut from the sacrificed goats, the initiates would run around in the streets flagellating women to promote fertility.

February 13, 2012

Top Ten Catholic Teachings Santorum Rejects while Obsessing about Birth Control

Top Ten Catholic Teachings Santorum Rejects while Obsessing about Birth Control | Informed Comment
The right wing Republican politicians who have been denouncing the requirement that female employees have access to birth control as part of their health benefits as an attack on religious freedom completely ignore the church teachings they don’t agree with. Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich are both Catholics, and wear their faith on their sleeves, but they are hypocritical in picking and choosing when they wish to listen to the bishops. 1. So for instance, Pope John Paul II was against anyone going to war against Iraq I think you’ll find that Rick Santorum managed to ignore that Catholic teaching. 2.The Conference of Catholic Bishops requires that health care be provided to all Americans. I.e., Rick Santorum’s opposition to universal health care is a betrayal of the Catholic faith he is always trumpeting. 3. The Catholic Church opposes the death penalty for criminals in almost all situations. (Santorum largely supports executions.) 4. The US Conference of Bishops has urged that the federal minimum wage be increased, for the working poor. Santorum in the Senate repeatedly voted against the minimum wage. 5. The bishops want welfare for all needy families, saying “We reiterate our call for a minimum national welfare benefit that will permit children and their parents to live in dignity. A decent society will not balance its budget on the backs of poor children.” Santorum is a critic of welfare. . . .