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January 11, 2014

Preacher convinces congregation that god gives them the power to eat anything, gets them to eat his lawn

The congregation ate the lawn, claimed it cured them of various maladies, then vomited all over the church. South African preacher makes congregation eat GRASS to be closer to God | Mail Online
A South African preacher made his congregation eat grass to 'be closer to God' before stamping on them. Under the instruction of Pastor Lesego Daniel of Rabboni Centre Ministries dozens of followers dropped to the floor to eat the grass at his ministry in Garankuwa, north of Pretoria after being told it will 'bring them closer to God.' His controversial methods have drawn criticism from thousands of people although members of his congregation swear by his methods - he is said to have claimed that humans can eat anything to feed their bodies and survive on whatever they choose to eat. . . . Photos that follow show dozens of people getting sick in the toilets - an image of the bathrooms show women clutching their stomach, while the men are vomiting in the sink.

January 02, 2014

On the myth of Jesus' foreskin

I never knew that so many people spent so much time obsessing over Jesus's mythical foreskin. January 1: Ecce Foreskin - Lawyers, Guns & Money : Lawyers, Guns & Money
According to Christian tradition, January 1 marks the eighth day of Jesus’ life. Among other things, it is the day on which — following Jewish custom — the Son of Man would have been circumcised. And while the rest of his body would presumably have ascended to heaven on the third day after his gruesome execution, early followers believed it quite possible that he had neglected to retrieve his long-excised foreskin before taking a seat at his father’s right hand. For medieval and early modern Christians, Jesus’ foreskin remained an object of peculiar veneration, with as many as eighteen different reliquary nubs of flesh competing for attention and honor. Charlemagne allegedly offered one to Pope Leo III as a gesture of gratitude for being crowned emperor in 800. Another, purchased from a vendor in Jerusalem at the end of the 11th century, was brought back to Antwerp as a souvenir from the first Crusade. Nearly 300 years later, St. Catherine of Siena purported to wear the foreskin as a ring, while the 13th century Austrian mystic Agnes Blannbekin had an even more unusual relationship with the sacred relic. By Agnes’ own account, she tasted the carne vera sancta — the “true and holy meat” — numerous times during communion. As she revealed to an anonymous Franciscan scribe, she had long pondered the whereabouts of Christ’s foreskin until she experienced a revelation one year on the Feast of the Circumcision. And behold, soon she felt with the greatest sweetness on her tongue a little piece of skin alike the skin in an egg, which she swallowed. After she had swallowed it, she again felt the little skin on her tongue with sweetness as before, and again she swallowed it. And this happened to her about a hundred times . . . . And so great was the sweetness of tasting that little skin that she felt in all limbs and parts of the limbs a sweet transformation. Similarly graphic, often erotic accounts helped assure that Agnes’ Life and Revelations would remain unpublished until the 20th century. . . .

Duck Dynasty dickhead thinks Chinese people are controlled by Satan

He also thinks the Nazis weren't Christians, which would probably be a surprise to them, seeing as how Hitler was a Catholic. There's a video at the link. Joe. My. God.: Phil Robertson: All Muslims And All Chinese Are Controlled By Satan
In the middle of his speech before the Hillsboro Church of Christ in El Dorado, AR, Robertson asked “What will do the Muslims (pronounced “Moose-limbs”) in?” Brandishing his Bible, Robertson answered “Violations of the law, that’s what’ll do ‘em in.” “What will do the Chinese in, if they don’t turn to Jesus?” Robertson asked, then answered “One violation.” Later in the speech, Robertson talked about those who are “controlled by the evil one.” “That’s why they run jet aircraft into buildings, because they’re under control of the evil one, that’s why they rob and kidnap and rape and pillage, because they’re under control of the evil one. That’s why they murder, from the Nazis, to the Shintoists, to the communists to this latest crop!” “You say ‘Why do they murder, why do they hate us?!” Robertson bellowed, slapping the podium. “Because all of them, those four groups, 80 years of history, they all want to conquer the world, they all rejected Jesus, and they’re all famous for murder. Nazis, Shintoists, communists, and the Muhammadists.” In case anyone thought he was referring only to some bad apples, Robertson added “Every one of them, the same way.”