Poor Mojo's Newswire

1. “Bob?” You violated the first law of the GYWO clip art!!! THESE DUDES DON’T HAVE NAMES. It’s “Accounts Receivable” and “Accounts Payable” and that’s IT. 2. The clip art is public domain, of course, anyone can do anything with it … but check out the word balloons! JAMBA JUICE TOTALLY BIT MY GYWO WORD BALLOON STYLE! Rounded-edge text box with single line pointing to mouth? I developed that in 2001 using Quark XPress 4!!! THAT’S MY SHIT!!! Jamba Juice, you’re a bunch of BALLOON-BITERS. 3. First person to sue Jamba Juice on my behalf CAN KEEP ALL THE MONEY. All I care about is destroying Jamba Juice and their overpriced dumb-ass juices. EAT A PIECE OF FRUIT, you morons, you’re missing most of the fiber.

Both the National Association for Black Veterans and the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs say they will inquire about the veterans' graves at Burr Oak. The FBI said it's too early to know just how many veterans' graves were violated. Agents just this week began the painstaking task of locating all the remains dumped in a fenced back lot of the cemetery. Robert Cocroft, national commander of the black veterans group, said he has spoken with Reede and others with relatives at Burr Oak who thought their loved ones were in their final resting places and now have only questions. Cocroft said his group's mission is to preserve the historical record and honor the service of African-American soldiers, making the Burr Oak scandal especially painful. The group is pledging to try to eventually account for all veterans' graves there, using whatever records might still be at Burr Oak or elsewhere. He noted that many of the veterans buried at the cemetery likely fought in World War II, returned to the Chicago area and in some cases then took part in the civil rights movement. "These are individuals, especially those who made the supreme sacrifice for their country, whose graves should not be desecrated," Cocroft said.

OXFORD, Ala. (AP)—A stone mound on a hill behind the Oxford Exchange created by American Indians 1,500 years ago will soon disappear. And whether Oxford's taxpayers wanted it or not, they paid for its destruction. Workers hired by the city's Commercial Development Authority (CDA) are using the dirt from the hill as fill for a new Sam's Club. The project has angered American Indians who, along with a Jacksonville State University archaeology professor, say the site could contain human remains. Oxford Mayor Leon Smith and City Project Manager Fred Denney say it was used to send smoke signals.

This morning, hundreds of Amazon Kindle owners awoke to discover that books by a certain famous author had mysteriously disappeared from their e-book readers. These were books that they had bought and paid for—thought they owned. But no, apparently the publisher changed its mind about offering an electronic edition, and apparently Amazon, whose business lives and dies by publisher happiness, caved. It electronically deleted all books by this author from people’s Kindles and credited their accounts for the price. . . . You want to know the best part? The juicy, plump, dripping irony? The author who was the victim of this Big Brotherish plot was none other than George Orwell. And the books were “1984” and “Animal Farm.”

A La Crosse woman is accused of stabbing her boyfriend Tuesday afternoon after she caught him watching pornography and masturbating, according to La Crosse police reports. Rachel Ferrara, 23, found her 24-year-old boyfriend inside her home at 920 Cameron Ave., No. 4, about 3:30 p.m., reports stated. The couple argued and Ferrara accused the man of being a “(expletive) cheater,” reports stated. She punched him twice in the abdomen and kicked him in the groin, police said. Ferrara then backed the man into the kitchen, where she grabbed a 5-inch serrated knife and slashed his arms before stabbing him in the abdomen, according to reports.

Earlier today, conservative pundit Pat Buchanan suggested that Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin’s husband should murder his daughter’s ex-fiance, Levi Johnston, for saying Palin’s decision to resign came down to “money.” While appearing on MSNBC’s Morning Joe, Buchanan said: BUCHANAN: “Well, first, with regard to Levi, I think First Dude up there in Alaska, Todd Palin, ought to take Levi down to the creek and hold his head underwater until the thrashing stops.“