"My Female Students Aren't Impressed With Me"
This is a lovely satire of male professors who prey on their students.
HANK: “S’a good question. Damn good question.”
HANK passes the bottle back to SMITTY.
SMITTY: “Because I sure as hell didn’t get it to compare a bunch of literature.”
SMITTY: [softly, almost to himself] “Compare a bunch of literatures at each other.”
HANK: “That’s not why I got into the business. No, sir. I got it so I could stand up in front of a group of mostly impressionable and anxious girls less than half my age and make them listen to me talk about how I proposed to my first fianc� and to deliver long, impassioned monologues about The Red Knight I memorized fourteen years ago.”
SMITTY: “I didn’t mind the work, though, Hank. As long as I could go to bed at night knowing that at least one girl who feeds herself with a school-sponsored meal plan was impressed with me. That’s all the thanks I needed. The admiration of that girl who has very little to compare me to, and also tenure.”
HANK: [solemnly] “And also tenure.”