« Was atmospheric lead responsible for America's violent crime rates? | Main | Indiana considering making school prayer mandatory »

Dean Trippe: Batman is a liberal

Responding to some dummies who think that just because Batman is super-rich, he must be a conservative, Dean Trippe drops some knowledge on their fool heads.

77% Recycled From Other Tumblrs | A friend of mine asked me recently, was I gonna go...

This is the kind of bullshit spewed by dummies who never read Batman comics and never watched Batman: The Animated Series and have never met me.

BASICALLY YOU GUYS ARE ALL STUPID AND DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT BATMAN.

First off, Batman fights those would would endanger others. That’s it. The majority of Batman’s villains have amassed criminal fortunes at the cost of innocent lives. Batman doesn’t give a damn about property or social status or even his own inherited wealth (except that it can be used to prevent tragedies like the one that defined his life), he only cares about saving lives. Preventing crime. Capturing criminals.

On top of that, dude is all the time giving criminals second chances. He gets ex-cons and even ex-Arkham patients(!) jobs at his own damn company, geniuses! Yeah, he’s such a Republican. Dude helps fund the police crime lab, manages outreach programs and scholarships, donates to every freaking charity in the city, and STILL spends all his time and money saving your hatin’ ass, because THAT’S WHO HE IS.

Please tell me Bruce Wayne isn’t for higher taxes for after school programs, public housing, and healthcare, all of which reduce crime, because I like arguing with people who don’t know shit. If Batman cared about his money, he’d be running Wayne Enterprises instead of letting his pal Lucius do that stuff. And he sure as heck wouldn’t be funding Batman, Inc. all over the world if it was just about getting his kicks punching poor criminals in the face.

Batman poured his bleeding heart out on the floor before congress to get federal assistance when Gotham needed it.

Batman FREQUENTLY adopts orphans whose parents he couldn’t save or who generally just need his help. (Robinhood is like the Big Brother program, but replace Big with Bat.)

Batman is hardcore BFFs with the biggest liberal softy in the DCU, Superman, whom he respects, both for his work as a superhero AND a member of the fourth estate.

Batman fights rich criminals all the damn time, son. And you know what? If you hench for a homicidal maniac, sometimes you get batarang’d and them’s the breaks. You don’t get to hurt people and get away with it in Gotham City. Not anymore.

Batman doesn’t kill. Batman doesn’t use guns. Batman wants the mentally ill to get help, not be sent to prison. Is it working out great? NOT REALLY, BECAUSE WE ALL WANT MORE ROGUES GALLERY STORIES. Blame the fans for the failure of Arkham, not Batman. Dude’s doing his level best, and it’s a damn sight better than any of you are doing.

But if you’re having trouble getting your head around there being ONE GOOD RICH GUY (and he’s fictional), let me break it down for you:

LEX LUTHOR IS A CONSERVATIVE.

BATMAN IS A LIBERAL.