« Poor Mojo's Almanac(k)
Issue #417 - Thurs., Jan. 15, 2009
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-13 degrees in Michigan this Morning

That's thirteen degress BELOW ZERO, and it's the legit temperature; none of this "wind-chill" padding it down to impress folks at home. My beard and mustache froze as soon as I stepped out the door, and it hurt to draw the air down to the bottom of my lungs. The locks on my brother-in-law's truck (which I'm borrowing) were frozen shut (not unusual), the windows were frosted inside and out (it happens), the parking brake was frozen (happened once before, on a -3 day), and the FUCKING CLUTCH WAS FROZEN. After scraping my windshield for a bit over one minute my thumbs were stiff and burning with the cold, and my pinkies numb, despite my double-layer Army issue mittens. At home, our boiler is howling like a banshee (stupid cursed heater).

This is the coldest day of my life. It's really refreshing, in uncertain times, to be able to say something so definitive.

This is the coldest day of my life.

I like that. How is it where you are?


The crazy gods of employment now have me searching media from home from 7-10 a.m., then going to work, so I missed the extra-special GodCold on the commute. But my basement workstation was unpleasantly chilly.

Let's see...it's only about 70 degrees warmer here. Record highs this week. Crazy.

I gotta get waxed so I can start working on my tan this weekend here in warm, sunny Berkeley. Summer in January! Praise the global warming demons!

To Hell with you waxy-assed Californians!

I hate to kick you when you're down dave-o, but it was near 90 at my house this week. Luckily I work closer to the beach so it was in the 80-85 range there.