So Begins Endgame!
Several of my Faithful Readers have drawn to my attention recent news items, exempli gratis:
As I am sure my Readers note, while in the common vernacular a "giant squid" refers to one such as myself -- the noble and handsome Architeuthis dux -- it seems that in the patois of lazy and excitable newsies, "giant squid" is somehow a synonym for "Humboldt Squid (also known as the "jumbo squid" -- a fine, if shameless, bit of self promotion.)
For comparison, while an average giant squid is more than 40 feet long and weighs upwards of 225 pounds, a strapping Humboldt squid is just 6 feet long in bowler and spats, and a scant 45 pounds -- and that when including the weight of his walking stick, pocket watch, fine cigars, cutter, and swollen billfold. As is clear, the "jumbo squid" is more akin to the "jumbo shrimp" than the "jumbo jet."
That all being said, I am myself delighted to learn that my guests are finally arriving en masse. Dedicated Readers, if you should happen to be in the vicinity of Southern Californium, and from there intend to pass to or toward my Motown of Detroit, I would much appreciate it if you might deign to drop by the beach, retrieve a few of my cohort and bring them hence. We have many of the hors d'oeuvre to prepare afore our festivities might begin.
I Remain,
Your Giant Squid