Poor Mojo's Two Minute Hate

If my teachers had had an ounce of human decency in them they might have assigned us “Macbeth” or Caesar’s “Gallic Wars,” figuring that the merry carnage would at least hold the boys’ interest for a while. Or they could have saddled us with “The Stranger,” which had the mitigating charm of being glib and pretentious and would thus have kept the kids who were obviously going to end up at Bard happy. But by insisting that we write a full report on an uncompromisingly depressing 19th-century novel by a writer who never allowed a single ray of sunshine to brighten his work, the powers-that-be at Cardinal Dougherty High School were merely taunting the student body.

The message said "We hope you're enjoying your copy of Twiliight Princess, but if you're finished with it, why don't you bring it to the store and trade it in? We're willing to give you $35 in trade for your copy of Twilight Princess...." It was at that point he hung up, in utter disgust we imagine. What kind of company does this sort of thing? Oh right, GameStop, now we know why we never shop there.

Traditionally, Valentine's Day has been a notable occasion only in the West, but in recent years, with the unprecedented media exposure we have through satellite TV and the Internet and as the subcontinent has come to blindly acquire every and anything the West does, the V-day theme has become the number one marketing idea on every advertisement agency's mind.

...in Pakistan at least, the majority of those celebrating V-day will be the young, and most of these young that will be celebrating by going out on dates wearing all red will probably be doing so by misleading the first people in their lives that made them realize what love really is - their parents. They fact that the many young people can trick their parents into thinking they're just going out with some friends for an honest lunch, and actually be with a perfect stranger they've made friends with on the Internet, or something, and call their hypocrisy love is depressing more the anything.

If I don’t hate Muslims I’m unpatriotic.

If I don’t hate the Mexicans I’m anti-American.

If I don’t hate homosexuals I must not care about family values.

I would like to stand up at this point and say, loudly, “BULLPUCKY!” I don’t have to hate Muslims to support the fight against terrorism. I don’t have to hate Mexicans to understand immigration problems. Homosexuals do not threaten me, my family, or my way of life. I don’t have to hate them, either. I am NOT going to start hating my neighbors for being different. I’m just not going to do it.”

Scientists are very interested in the ways we deny humanity to others, because this common tendency is the source of so much hate and violence in the world....sychologists Stephen Loughnan and Nick Haslam of the University of Melbourne decided to look behind overt insults to see if we do in fact malign others in a variety of ways, some more subtle than others. They hypothesized that, while animals and machines are both less than human, they are less than human in very different ways. That is, dogs and cows lack traits that are unique to humans, like high intelligence and moral sensibility, while androids and robots lack traits that form the foundation of “human nature”: warmth, flexibility, animation. They further predicted that some humans—like children and artists—tend to be associated with animals, lacking traits like civility and self-control. Others—say, businessmen—more typically lack openness and emotion; in our minds, they are more like robots.

I take it that it's supposed to mean "end hate." But when you use a tag like [/i], you don't mean "end italics" in the sense "abandon italics forever." You mean "I've been using italics for a bit, I'm stopping for a while now, but I'll get back to using it later."

Substitute "hate" for "i," and you'll get my drift. I bet the guy has a [hate] T-shirt in his closet that he was wearing three days before; he's hated all the stuff between then and the [/hate] shirt; and he'll be wearing the shirt next time he's got some hating to do. Plus he certainly wouldn't just wear the [/hate] shirt without having worn before, and on the same page -- that would be syntactically non-compliant.

I hate that moves like this are pushing out soap operas (do you realize Days of Our Lives is now the last soap on NBC??) and syndicated shows.

And Mac OS X is littered with it. It’s everywhere - in the Dock, in Terminal, in Dashboard, etc.

At one point, you could see about 5 layers of transparency at once on my screen, like this:

An example of multiple layers of transparency on my desktop.

Yup, pretty ridiculous.

But recently, I’ve decided that I hate transparency.

Sure it’s pretty, but I realized that transperency is the difference between easy-to-read and hard-to-read; the difference between strain on my eyes and beautiful text. So I turned off transparency in every place I could, and I encourage you to do it to.

You know what I mean. The book is a symbol of education and class, more so than money since money can only give the appearance of acculturation. This should be a good thing since books represents knowledge, self-betterment or intellectual/cultural/aesthetic achievement. And we as librarians tout the image of the book as way of motivating our patrons to take advantage of what books offer them.

But there is a dark side to all of this: the book as a litmus test of intellectual or social acceptability. Does a dislike of reading books make someone deficient? Do your friends (or heaven forbid, YOU) make judgments about others based on their taste in reading? Or lack of interest in reading? You don't do it? Browse through Myspace or any other social networking site, take a look at what folks list as their favorite books and try not to react with some sort of visceral opinion as to their intellectual/aesthetic sensibilities. It's darn near impossible.

For many folks these are the exact reasons why they don't read: books represent an intellectual (and at times a moral) failing on their part. And those of us on the other side do little to dissuade them from their self-image.

Keats named the ringtone "My Cage (Silence for Cellphone)" after the artist John Cage, who once similarly composed four minutes and thirty-three seconds of silence.

I’d turn myself in if they’d take me, but, according to my lawyers, I have yet to break a law. Yet it was my action that caused all this mess. I should be put to trial – crimes against humanity – and forced to walk the crossroads till I find repentance.

It began several years ago when a bicycle-riding 12 year old almost ran over a middle-aged woman on 6th and Market. “Watch out, kid!” I yelled at him.

“Fuck you, bitch,” he yelled back. Then more, then more.

I kept walking, but he swerved back my way, taunting me then hocking a lugubrious wad of saliva in my direction. The bulbous loogie hung in the air for a brief second before landing on my back, hating its way through my brand new shirt I had bought at the Gap.

I chased the boy, ready to hate him with more words – club words that would make him bruise. I even called a cop. The peace officer hated the boy with a precise swat to the Achilles tendon with the old nightstick on their way to the squad car.

After all, I celebrate it. Tibetan-Buddhist style.

I celebrate the "Peace On Earth, Good Will Toward Men" part. The Beatitude part. The Golden Rule part. The actual words of actual Jesus part.

I don't celebrate other parts of Christmas. Not the Torquemada part. Not the conversion by the sword part. Not the Albigensian Massacre part. Not the witch-burning part.

And I'm not so thrilled when people wish me, "Merry Christmas," frankly. I always wish them "Merry Christmas," back, but I wish they'd ask before assuming I'm the same religion as they are. I don't go around wishing Catholics "Happy Hannukah," or wishing Presbyterians "Happy Ramadan," or wishing Muslims "Happy Buddha's Birthday." I think it's good manners to check, is it not?

The Hate I Don't Get You List: Dreadlocks Edition

1) Uneccessary Comments | 2) White Folks With Dreads | 3) Dreadlocked Brothas

Simply put - I hate being sick.

I think I have a fair sense of what both halves amount to: the perfectly tasteful canonization of a select group of mostly incontrovertible American comics artists: Will Eisner, Jack Kirby, Harvey Kurtzman, and other names familiar to anyone with a cursory history of the art form. Their work — original, full-sized comic pages in their rough, unabashed glory — is all exquisitely and gorgeously hung, perfectly fitting to such a hallowed group of names. These folks are all giants in their field, influential and inspiring.

Conservatives are often accused of hating immigrants. Not true. Conservatives believe immigration is good for America and whether you're talking about someone who's white, black, Hispanic, Asian, you name it, it makes no difference. What conservatives do get concerned about is people coming to this country illegally....

Conservatives are often accused of hating Muslims. Not true. Although you may find a few people at the fringes who can't tell the difference between moderates and terrorists, that's not true of most conservatives....

Conservatives are often accused of hating Jews. Not true. As a general rule, conservatives are much more supportive of Israel than liberals and some of the most prominent conservatives are Jewish.

Conservatives are often accused of hating poor people. Not true. In fact, many conservatives, myself included, are poor people or have been poor. What conservatives believe is that except in a few limited cases, it's not the job of the government to do things for people, it's the job of the government to make it easier for people to do things for themselves....

Conservatives are often accused of hating liberals. Not true....despite their flaws, liberals are just misguided, not bad people.

There were two canaries inside the cage and two on top. I was keeping a close eye on them, and because it had just got dark enough, I was busy bringing them inside. When I went back outside after Tseep, there was only one canary on top. I shone my torch around the aviary, knowing already… and there was the little body, with its head torn off, just like Jack’s. The %$#&*\ rodent murderer. What is this idiotic charade people so reverently refer to as “Mother Nature”?

I love looking out at the snow.
I hate driving in the snow.

I love giving fun toys and games to my kids.
I hate that nobody ever gives ME fun toys and games anymore.

I love listening to Christmas music.
I hate listening to Christmas music, 'round about midnight of December 25th.

I love the looks on my kids' faces when they open their presents.
I hate having to figure out where to put all this new stuff they're getting.

I love the cookies and treats.
I hate that my clothes won’t fit right for weeks after.

I love watching A Christmas Story, Home Alone, and Polar Express with my kids. And, after they go to bed, watching Christmas Vacation with my wife.
I hate that there are so many horrible Christmas movies out there, like Deck The Halls and Jingle All The Way.

I love egg nog ice cream.
I hate peppermint ice cream.

I love forgetting about the world's troubles for just a few days.
I hate that the troubles seem to always return in a worse way.

I hate the sheer unremitting tackiness of the street decorations and window displays. Tatty tinsel, gurning Santas, irregularly twinkling lights and nasally irradiated reindeer do not spell taste and refinement. They do not even spell cheerily ramshackle seasonal goodwill. They spell cynical and unimaginative consumerism packaged to appeal to the spoilt brat lurking in all of us. And don't get me started on the "Best Xmas Album Ever" which tinnily assails ones eardrums regardless of which emporium you are reluctantly venturing into....

I hate shop assistants who will insist on engaging one with promotional platitudes when it is blindingly obvious to all concerned that you are, in fact, a wild-eyed misanthropist with zero tolerance for such flummery. I hate their grating persistence almost as much as the Scroogish tendencies of the retail industry, which drives them to these irritating lengths in the first place.

I hate choosing appropriate presents for people. My imagination always fails me and I fall back on the tried and tested confectionary/toiletries/book/cd combo which I invariably receive myself and regard with absurdly unfair disdain.

Every year I promise myself that I will shop early, maintain a positive frame of mind and actually enjoy the whole festive experience. Who am I kidding? Not even myself any more...

3. “I think we’ve screwed the pooch.”

5. “Irregardless” Not a real word, dipshit.

7. "Beware of Internet predators” As if we have rabid jackals lurking in our computers.

Now I need to go get my hair cut. I hate getting my hair cut. Last time was in the summer and Imbi did it at the cottage. At least I got to stare at the lake and listen to good music. Now I need to walk down the street and try out a barber I've never used before. I hate this. And then I have to get pictures taken. I hate that to - I always end up looking like some foreign criminal (I'm not, really I'm not).

It's probably very comforting to these Virginian Episcopalians that Nigerian Archbishop Peter J. Akinola is pretty tough on homosexuals in Africa:

Um. What? That's some Taliban-esque shit right there. Actually, to be fair, the Parable where all the gays are incarcerated has always been my favorite. Fuck the Prodigal Son. Many Biblical historians believe that Jesus himself went door-to-door in Galilee to speak of the homosexual threat.

"They're in our schools and in our churches and they will convert your children," spoke Jesus of Galilee on the Sabbath.

The woo-hoo. It's everywhere. It's not enough that Al Roker is standing in front of a crowd outside of The Today Show, the crowd actually has to do that long "wooooooooo-hoooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" every time the camera is even remotely pointed in their direction.

I can't even understand how people do it physically.

4. I hate pop boy bands singing Christmas classics just to sell a few more albums, or silly Christmas songs like "Grandma got run over by a Reindeer "or the "barking dogs."

7. I hate the debate about the politically correctness of wishing some one Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or Seasons Greetings.

11. I hate that there are political factions working at removing "Nativity Scenes from public buildings, and parks.

13. I hate that our military families will be without love ones this Christmas.

I love the holiday season because of the time I have with my children and grandchildren. I love being able to cook and bake and make memories. I love the spirit of compassion that runs through our community - the turkey, toy and coat drives, and the stories of "random acts of kindness" that fill the airways.

I hate the holidays though because the paradox of poverty becomes even more glaring during the commercialism of the holiday season. It is also generally the time people are most in need and the money to run programs are exhausted for the year. If you work in serving the most vulnerable, usually you spend the majority of your holiday season scrambling to raise money, find volunteers, and prepare Christmas for hundreds. The stress of it all makes it tough to keep the "holiday spirit"....

Generally, sometime during the holiday season usually around the 20th of December, I have a day where I think - "Forget this, I'm going to work for McDonald's. In fact I'd make more money doing that than this!"

But I can't avoid it without things getting worse, and therefore we go.

Once again I won't post any details, other than I wish this entire thing was already over.

That being said, please wish us luck and if you are so inclined, pray for us.

...some other influential bloggers have been questioning where digg's going an the quality of stories being put out there. The entire "mob rule" is being placed into question, especially in light of how John Chow's blog has been banned from digg submissions.

I really see digg's audience changing from the technology and geek readers and branching out and attracting mainstream readership. I read and hear a lot about professionals in our industry having their stories "dugg" but then the discussions that happen on the threads show the total lack of knowledge of the area the article speaks to. It is not saying that the "diggerz" are dumb or stupid, they really are just lacking the in-depth day in and day out knowledge the technology and search industry professionals have.

As new "diggerz" come into the fold the more it annoys and drives away the early adopters. Not necessarily those who "digg" lots of stories, but more the folks who read the stories. Both Rob Hof and Scoble point out they are opting out of the feeds from digg, as the stories being submitted are no longer of much value to them. This is just how services who have been in the "geek realm" change when they reach the mainstream, an evolution, it changes and morphs once the mainstream populace gets a hold of it.

Add this to the fact that it's getting colder outside, and my lovely house, as you may recall, is hell to heat. The thermostat is set at a toasty 60 degrees, and even with that, I paid ridiculous bills last year. This year, I've promised myself that I will not, not, not pay an $800 heating bill -- even if this means that I run around in long underwear and multiple layers drinking tea and wearing mittens. ...

I had hoped to polish off a dissertation chapter over the break, but I'm not sure that this will be possible. It's looking increasingly like I'll end up working extra shifts at Jobs # 2, 3, and 4 -- just go keep my head above water.

Wilderness is an uninhabited place. There is nothing there, nobody there. Everything is one color. Feeling isolated, maybe forgotten about, we wander, wonder, ask questions, even doubt. We watch a tumbleweed roll by and wish WE had someplace to go. Pretty sad.

But the wilderness comes right before the fulfillment of the promises God makes to his children. There’s only one way to get TO the other side, I guess. And that’s through it. We have to go through the wilderness to get to the other side. I hate that about the wilderness. Couldn’t God just sent a little helicopter out here and airlift us out of this waiting and wondering?

7pm update: the flu appears to be a feverish case of mastitis. which disguises itself as the flu. until the breasts turn into - owww - let's not talk about it, shall we?

The truth is, the law is, cyclists have the same rights as cars on the road. If they drift into your lane, it's up to you to avoid them. If they run a stop sign or red light, they can get a ticket. If they run afoul of a car, though, a different set of laws comes into play - Newton's Laws. And when it's car versus bicycle, the object acted upon most violently is the bicyclist.

I'm not advocating the vehicular mayhem on PCH, just reporting it. I see it every day. So if you're driving a car, share the road. And if you're riding a bike, share the road. And if you're the guy who hit-and-run my bicyclist neighbor John last year, left him on the pavement, put him into the ICU for weeks, left him unsure if he'll ever work again, please know another set of laws applies. Karma, baby. It's real and it's gonna get you.

1) I hate rejecting manuscripts. This is probably the hardest part about my job. At the SCBWI Oregon retreat, the other editor there talked about an altered decline letter they have hanging up in the office where instead of "your manuscript" it says "you" so instead of "your manuscript is not satisfying enough" or "After careful consideration, we must pass on your manuscript" it says "YOU are not satisfying enough" or "After careful consideration, we must pass on YOU." It's a reminder to them that there is a person on the other end of the letter, and to that person, to that author, we aren't just rejecting their work, but are rejecting them.

2) I hate not being able to sign up everything that I want to work on.

3) I hate being the bearer of bad news.

4) This is a more minor thing, but I hate writing jacket copy and catalog copy and other kinds of marketing copy.

And now I feel all gross for using the "H" word so much. Kinda dirty.

...People, commonly tourists or folks new to the area, think they can drive that stretch of highway at normal speed, despite the fact that the road is coated with ice and snow. Those are the people I'm genuinely scared of: the out-of-towners driving their SUVs that fly around with their four-wheel-drive summer tires on, thinking they're invincible because they have four-wheel drive. Nevermind that having four-wheel-drive really doesn't help you in this weather -- it just makes it so you lose control and slip with all four wheels instead of two.

Here are a few more: agile development (anyone over 50 can hit the bricks); alignment (my way; antonym: the highway); onboarding (oops, outsourcing was a disaster); sysprog and sysadmin (major and minor deities); team player (anyone who gets alignment).

I know most of the things I deal with are common to all middle school teachers. This week we got into a discussion about MySpace in eighth grade; the kids were incensed that teachers might look at their MySpace accounts. I pointed out that anybody in the planet can; they aren't private. (I know you can make your profile private, but even those who do often comment on others' sites that are public.) My favorite quote: "If I want to endanger my safety, that's my own business." By the end of the conversation, the students were furious.

So many of my students don't turn in their assignments. We just got through report cards and parent/teacher conferences, with all the associated weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth, and we're three weeks into a new quarter. Parents made threats, removed privileges, and punished their children in ways I'd be mandated to report if I lived in the United States. Yet when I entered grades today in my classroom, I was horrified by how low some of them are already. (It's just amazing watching the effect of a zero on a grade.) How quickly they forget.

I only wish they would do a “Cribs: Bums of NYC” now that would be a show I would want to partake in the viewing of. Think about it, we know where the rich live, the burbs, million dollar apartments, and Hollywood, that’s it. Where is the excitement? With “Cribs: Bums of NYC” who know what adventures we could have.

Someone bring me a hacksaw.

And yet we just can't help but hate them. Their great sin? They win too much.

4. Using Firefox on multiple machines at the same time on corporate networks under the same login is impossible.

5. The Firefox spell checker doesn’t know that Firefox is a name.

7. Rapidly closing many porn sites is impossible as you have to move to each tab to press the close button.

10. The Adobe PDF viewer in Firefox is awful - buggy, slow and can hang your Firefox session.

“I’m a worker, not a waiter!” a Fordlandia employee reportedly yelled in the food line one day, sparking the plantation’s most notorious riot. Workers armed with machetes joined the protest against the self-serve mid-western cuisine in a country where food traditionally was served at the table. The seringueiros demolished the cafeteria as North American officials scrambled to the dock, jumped into boats and waited in the middle of the river for Brazilian troops to quell the melee...

“A workman’s mess hall was set up but native workers did not like the wholesome Detroit-style cooking and complained bitterly of indigestion. North American fare in the jungle no more pleases the customers than a quick change to Amazon fare would please you or me,” Wilson wrote in a Harpers magazine article titled “Mr. Ford in the Jungle.” Furthermore, the natives did not choose to square dance on the village green or to sing the quaint folk songs of Merrie England or to treasure Longfellow.”

5. Easier access to all your tools.

10. Give us paid web search support

12. Be more responsive to click fraud complaints

15. Put the brakes on self-serve AdSense.

16. Stop giving away Blogger for free.

22. Stop opening products to everyone, then getting overwhelmed.

25. Fix the philosophy.

**** Electronic Voting Machines - I keep hearing, and reading about the crookedness perpetrated by the people in charge of these machines. I don't know whether any of this is true. I am just so sick of hearing about this.

**** *Politicians - Last but not least, Politicians. I don't like them. I hate having vote for them. And no matter who I vote for and what party he is in I feel dirty voting for them.

"The joke in The Who circle was they had done everything but 'Tommy On Ice' so I suppose this is better than 'The Bob Dylan Icecapades'," he said.

Dennis J. Richards, chief of detectives, confirmed that the package was dropped off to James E. Grace Funeral Home, 335 Ontario St. There was a note along with the baby's body.

The package was not opened until later Wednesday. The funeral director thought that it might have been a package for his wife, Richards said, and he set it aside.

It was unclear if the baby was delivered alive to the door, if the baby was already dead or even if the baby was stillborn before the drop-off, Richards said. Homicide officials will wait for the results of an autopsy that is expected to be performed today at the Erie County medical examiner's office.

When I select a tab it highlights the text inside the tab?

Needless to say, many of us are pissed. But not nearly as many as there will be. The memo came to certain members of management, so I don't think most employees know about the rules just yet. I'll be the first to say that Best Buy is usually nothing short of great to it's employees, it is by far the best company I've ever worked for, but they really dropped the ball on this one from an employee standpoint.

Ford said it would restate results from 2001 through the second quarter and cautioned that operating results would weaken further in the current quarter.

Ford also said it was considering raising new funding secured by its automotive assets in order to protect its cash position as it pays the bill to close 16 plants and cut up to 45,000 jobs.

On one hand, I understand that they want to ship a fully functional product they can be proud of. One the other, wouldn't it be possible, over the course of two years, to have such a product ready? I guess I am just a little disappointed, but as I said, at least they are taking their time and getting it done right.

In another thread, Eyonix is promising a content patch sometime before the expansion to keep us all busy. What is in this patch? According to Eyonix, it will contain a new honor system, some new talents and abilities and a bunch of other goodies. This is good news, but I was really hoping to have the expansion in my hands before the end of the year.