Michael Crook tried to kiss my dog!
And the dog didn't want him to, and so Michael started to cry, and so the dog let him, even though it made him feel bad inside.
And the dog was a boy dog.
(alternate headline: "Michael Crook is a Gay Date-Raping Dog Kisser")
Alan, please produce an appropriate picture and add it to this post. Thank you.
Alan sez: Your wish is my command, boss! Just look below the fold. Not safe for work, no, not at all.
And of course, these "Michael Crook" stories are works of fiction. Any resemblance between characters in this work and any person is coincidental.
Hey, what if I have a real life (rather than an Internets addiction) and don't know what a "Michael Crook" is? If you couldn't give a shit, please scroll down for more tasty hate.