Poor Mojo's Two Minute Hate: I hate Fergie

The Lost Boy | I hate Fergie

I hate Fergie with a passion. The Black Eyed Peas are a terrible group by themselves, but she makes them even worse; and now she is, allegedly, a solo-performer. I wouldn’t call her a singer. I wouldn’t call her a rapper. Heck, I don’t even know what she is.

I wish she’d disappear. Her latest “song” is ‘London Bridge’. I hear it four or five times a day on the radio in my office. It drives me crazy. Let’s have a look at some of her inspiring lyrics:

“Grey Goose got your girl feeling loose.
Now I’m wishin’ that I didn’t wear these shoes. (I hate heels)
It’s like everytime I get up on the dew,
Paparazzi put my business in the news.
And I’m like get up out my face, (oh shit)
‘fore I turn around and spray your ass with mace. (oh shit)
My lips make you wanna have a taste. (oh shit)
You got that?”

What does it all mean? It’s a song about nothing.